Problematic Elements of Rom-Coms

Every Saturday night, millions of single boys and girls turn on their favourite rom-coms and fantasize about the relationship they DON’T have. Yes, rom-coms are cute, my favourites include, “10 Things I Hate About You”, “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days”, “Clueless”, and “Grease”. Of course they’re fun to watch, but looking back our hearts were so invested in the relationship between the 2 leads, our brains failed to realize just how problematic some of them were.

The Coloured Best Friend

Most of our favourite 90s and 00s rom-coms feature a beautiful, skinny, white woman as the lead. The only people of colour in the movie are reduced to a supporting role of being the protagonist's best friend. For example, in Clueless, white girl Cher’s best friend is a black woman, who’s only purpose is to stand with Cher, without outshining her. The same thing happens in 10 Things I Hate About You. Pretty, petite, white girl Biannca is really popular at school, and her best friend is a black girl, who also has no purpose except to support Biannca’s character.

Lack of Representation

Just like the coloured best friend problem, the protagonist is almost always white, skinny, pretty and a little clumsy. The reason why I bring up the clumsy thing is, Hollywood loves cute girls. Remember, she can’t be too perfect. The best example of this is Jenna Rink in 13 Going on 30. Jennifer Garner is a supremely beautiful woman, basically perfect. In order to be more relatable;e to the audience, she’s clumsy, girl, cute and silly. Almost every lead in a successful rom-com is white. However, there is one exception. Lara Jean from TATBILB is an asian woman with a white best friend. I have to give props to them for flipping this standard on its head and making a very successful film with cultural representation.

The Woman is the Reward

In a lot of rom-coms, the end goal for the man is to get the woman he wants. He may not even know her that well, but he thinks she’s pretty and now he has his eyes set on her. In 10 Things I Hate About You, Cameron sees Biannca and instantly decides that he likes her and wants her all to himself. He orchestrates an entire plan, involving her sister, in order to win her over. This idea that once you have the girl, you win, is toxic because it feeds into the idea that women are objects made to fit the male fantasy. This boosts a man’s ego because once he has her, he owns her. This may not be a rom-com, but Kabir Singh is the WORST movie, which includes this idea. As soon as Kabir sees Preeti, he automatically decides that he owns her and even threatens to beat up any guy who looks at her. The most ridiculous thing about this ideology is, it’s romanticized. For all the ladies out there, it’s not romantic to be the object of someone’s desire based on your looks. It’s not romantic for someone to beat up anyone who breathes in the same vicinity as you. You are your own person, and I choose to not feed into the male fantasy of women living to please men.

At the end of the day, movies are fictional, but they do have a real impact on audiences.